It’s the ABCs of Homeschooling with Dawn over at 5 Kids and a Dog, and today, we are on the letter N.
This is likely one of the few negative homeschooling related posts that you will see me write, but it is something that we encounter frequently. Thus, it must be mentioned!
My N word is nosey people. We really like to get out to museums, parks, and shopping when the schools are in session. However, this almost always leads to people commenting about our children’s “absence from school”.
On the first day of our local school year last fall, I took our kids to the pool. A lady looked at us and said, “It’s the first day of school. Why aren’t your kids in school?” Of course, I said that we homeschool, and she looked at us like we were from Mars.
The other main question that people ask us is, “Why are your kids so inquisitive?” Really??? Our kids want to learn. What about yours? You can tell that this is a source of contention with me.
It is not all bad… One time, when the gentleman came to clean our chimney, the kids were peering in his van and asking him what everything was for. He looked at me and asked if they were homeschooled. He said that he could always tell who the homeschoolers were because they wanted to learn. We certainly didn’t mind this interaction, but these experiences are far and few between.
So, how do you respond to nosey people when your family is out?
Visiting from the hop! I just started homeschooling my 3yo and people look at me like I’m crazy when I tell them that I want to continue to homeschool her. I just tell them that it’s a passion of mine and they leave it alone. I truly love teaching her and couldn’t imagine NOT doing it.
We’ve been homeschooling for 6 years, and what we have found is that some locations have more resistance than others. The people in some areas of the country seem to be more judgmental than others.
Good for you to want to continue!
hahaha i get this all the time with my kids “wow your kids sure do ask a lot of questions” umm would you rather them just glower at you from the corner?
I agree! School should not just be about “facts”. It should foster a desire to learn.
I think people are more curious than anything, especially when they see us out during school hours. We haven’t had a whole lot of negative comments lately but in the past we sure did. I have even had total strangers ask my kids if they miss school, or about what they study (looking for subject names). Crazy and annoying but usually I let my kids answer, and I will give an answer if it is appropriate. My “nonanswer” when someone is truly nosey or being rude is “This is what works best for us”, as we walk away. We HAVE had some great, positive comments from passersby, repairmen, and even the barber though, so I think the good outweigh the bad most of the time.
We used to live in an area of the country that seemed to be less judgmental, and many people didn’t even question. Where we are now, we get many questions. Most of the questions are not of the curiosity level but more of, “Why aren’t your kids in school?” {Insert argumentative tone of voice for previous question} Unfortunately, we have to walk away too frequently.
I LOVE people who are curious…those who truly want to know!
Oh, a little more about “Don’t you miss school?” My son’s resource room teacher asked him that about six months after I pulled him out of school… and the thing is, he DID miss school. Still DOES miss school. What it comes down to is the choice a FAMILY has made and putting my son into an emotional tailspin wasn’t a very nice thing to do.
It doesn’t seem like the teacher had your son’s best interest in mind! His teacher should have been able to tell if he was adjusting well and happy. Sometimes, it seems like a personal agenda, like homeschooling is a personal affront against teachers. It really isn’t because homeschooling isn’t for everyone. That wasn’t very nice!
Luckily, we have had positive responses to when my daughters or I tell others that they are homeschooled. If we did encounter someone who was negative about it, I think I’d have the same reaction as Dawn by saying “Homeschooling is the best choice for both the girls. It works so well for our family!”
I’m glad that you have had positive responses! There are so many pros to homeschooling!
I’ve had a couple of people in our complex ask if my son will be starting kindergarten. Also, there is another woman who has a son my daughter’s age. She was asking about preschool programs and didn’t get it when I
said we are homeschooling.
It seems that many people stress over getting their children into just the right preschool and kindergarten. I am so glad that, as homeschoolers, we don’t have to get caught up in all of that. However, I had never heard of homeschooling until my DD was almost ready for school. I hope that the people in your complex become more understanding!
The majority of our negative responses have come from family and close friends. Family I think it’s just better to show them by homeschooling well, than it is to discuss it. With the one friend let’s just say that we are no longer friends. The things she said to me about homeschooling ruined the friendship and we were friends for 14 + years. Strangers usually don’t give us a passing glace when we say we homeschool.
That saddens me to hear that most of your negative experience has come from family and friends! I definitely agree that showing them is the best way for that. I sure hope that they will realize in due time…
Great post!! We plan to do a lot of field trips so I imagine we will be gettig this question a lot too!
Thanks! As you can see from the comments, it really seems to differ from location to location. I really hope that you don’t run into it, but at least, you can be prepared.